Saturday, March 19, 2011

Sweet Spring Saturday

This has been a week in my life that I knew one day would come.  The things that happened this week have happened many times before - in many different degrees and to many different people.  I also realize that everything that has happened this week will possibly happen again with more intensity. This week, I have prayed a lot, cried a lot, and prayed some more.  Mostly for the people who have recently left my life and the hurt that they have experienced.  Hurt people hurt people.

This week, I have prayed and pondered.  Maybe I should write them a note?  Maybe I should visit them?  Text?  E-mail?  I don't know. Maybe it would help, but maybe it wouldn't. Maybe I should just keep praying and ponder. . .these things in my heart.

This morning, I finished reading the book about Amy Carmichael that I will start reading to our Junior Church kiddos tomorrow.  I started reading it to get my bearings in the book.  Even though it's written on a children's level, I couldn't help but finish it for all of the encouragement it brought me.  Amy had so much faith.  I have read her story many times in the past, but have always been renewed and encouraged by it.  She had so many instances of desperation - and every time, God came through for her.  My God is the same One, and He will come through for me as well.  Romans 8:28

After I finished reading Amy's book, I read my Bible.  The reading that I had for today was to finish reading Ecclesiastes.  I sighed in relief at the familiarity of it.  A requirement from an editing class that I took in college was that we memorize the last part of Ecclesiastes 12.  Even though I can no longer recite it word for word (I try to remember, but I only ever get to extreme familiarization.  I blame dyslexia. :) ), it felt like an old friend.  That's what the Bible is supposed to be, isn't it?  Anyway, I read the beginning and understood it in a way that I never have before.  Remember thy Creator. . .in the days of thy youth.  According to the next few verses, it seems to me that God is also telling us to remember during the good times. . .because the bad times are coming.  Another thing I read differently is the part about much study being a weariness of the flesh.  This week, I have worn myself out studying the situation.  I recognized that.

Then I read the next verse:  "Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter:  Fear God, and keep his commandments:  for this is the whole duty of man."  No matter what happens in life - in everything, my duty is to fear God and keep His commandments.  I am to respect that God is God.  He knows what He is doing.  He allows everything that happens to happen.  He is control.  I am also to keep His commandments.  I am to love God and love my neighbor.  I love those who have hurt me, as well as those who have not.  I am to love those who are still in my life, as well as those who have left.

Then the last verse:  "For God shall bring every work into judgement, with every secret thing, whether it be good, or whether it be evil."  God will judge the actions of others.  I don't have to.  God will judge me for my reactions to the actions of others.  I want for Him to be happy with my reactions.  I know that I am a sinning human and will not always do what is right, but with God's help, I will do what He said.  I choose to obey.  I choose to love.

P.S.  I realize that I have a pattern going on with the first word of every paragraph!  This, This, After, Then, Then.  :)

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